A soliloqy

Dear 16 old me,

Here I am listening Ted talking about is vision for himself 5yrs down the line.  He is looking at the balance of life, his physical space, his work space, his emotional space, his financial space. I wish I could have done the same for you.

Well but that was a different plane all together, you did know that you could and would bring about change, the revolution, ”Kattuvevu naavu hosanaadanu, rasada beedondanu” the dream peddled by every revolutionary and every dreamer, a dream of building a new nation that progressive.  If I had known then what I know today I would have asked you to define what you mean by progress and what was the price that you would be willing to pay for it.

But back then, revolution was about breaking rules, remember Grandma Parwati telling you, comply with the small rules then when you  break the big ones not only will you create the revolution but you will also harness the goodwill. Well you did not realize the wisdom then.

There is also the fact that all revolutions need not happen with vocal dramatics, there are lot of silent revolutions, the change in the society from then to today well it is a silent revolution. Prophets and Rebel leaders come at a time when the world is not really ready for them so they have to create the turbulence but when the world is ready for the change it happens silently but quite powerfully.

The adrenaline infused aggressive revolution that you envisioned well, that is kind of spectator sport you know, people sit on the fence,  sigh and weigh and finally cast their side with winning side.

Don’t  judge me, and say I have become institutionalized, I am just a rebel as you are, the difference when an adult rebels it sounds like being a glorious saviour, but when teenager rebels she is being prodded by the Devil or is the devil incarnate.

Yes I do acknowledge you for your courage, of living your own unique brand without apology, despite being threatened by institutions of understandings with a closed mind. you did trigger changes though minor ripples by thinking outside the box. These pebbles would someday be the seed of the avalanche of change you want. May be somewhere along the line you should realize that it is not about fighting what is wrong, it is about fighting for what is right.

When I look at the results of the political battles you thought was worth putting your energy into, today, I realize all those went hoarse talking about freedom, and religious equality well wanted the freedom to tell you what you should do, it was not about your freedom. All those wars on common civil code, there is nothing civil about it, it is about erasing other cultural ethos and not balancing the religious ethos, matriarchy has been erased, empowered women have been rendered voiceless, the Mahisuramardhini is has been muted to make place for Rama.

this article is an excerpt from my NANOWRMO writing.

The powerful Mahishasuramardhini has been disempowered to a Kadva chauth performing Bimbo. Is this the battle you wanted to fight?

Anyway dear, your dreams and destination belonged to your age and era, I am moving on to mine, dictated by learning and limitations, I’m not emerging out of stillness for I realize that is the way to deal with the quicksand, that is the path to destination you chose. Have faith

Rest assured I am still walking the path.

This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda.



7 thoughts on “A soliloqy

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    1. I thought so too, but I realized that the common civil code in the frame work of what is being presented reeks of Patriarchy. It homogenizes the country into the cowbelt culture. Unless the common civil code is really understood in its totality it might be falling from the pan to the fire. Having said that in Goa we have common civil code and it is working fine. Because it structured so.

      1. I completely agree with you, what the present government is presenting under the title of Uniform civil code must be understood by all religion reps and then implemented, otherwise it will also not be so effective like Lokpal Bill.
        About Goa, I appreciate the strong decision taken by govt and the massive support given by everyone for it.

      2. oh! it is not that BJP and Maharashtravadi parties did not try, but the portuguese tradition is so inbuilt and people have realized the advantages of it. When we see Burkha clad women we know they are not from Goa. When smokes in public again we know it is not a Goan. Until the Konkan railway came Goa was so safe.

      3. Yeah konkan railway has made Goa more accessible to most region of Karnataka, Maharashtra etc. I have been coming to Goa from.childhood and I can see the difference you have been mentioning. I love Goa and hope it maintains it hostility forever.

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